My first article...

I am publishing my first article which was unpublished in the college mag.Obviously,its trash.Well,I,Arjun,didnt write it.It was my alter ego who wrote such a trash piece.And my alter ego blames his alter ego.And my alter ego's alter ego in turn,blames me for writing crap.It is,therefore,an incontrovertible fact that we are caught in the blame game.I am the prince of "pseudo" and I am sure you are "pseudo impatient" enough to read it.Well enough of pseudogiri , for now lets see the article..

THE CROW

I was asked to write an article by my colleague. I was more than willing to write one. But I mentioned that I couldn’t find a topic, which was non-controversial. She told me to write on the crow. “Crow”, I yelled at her showing my disbelief over the wacky topic. The next day I pondered over it and said, “why not a try!”

The crow is a beautiful bird. I am obviously talking from my perspective. If you have a closer look you will find that a crow has lean legs. It reminds me of any lanky model walking on the ramp. Yeah, the crow must be having a cat “fly” on their ramp(read sky) and I guess the other birds would be having a ball watching the ramp show. The crow has a very angular face similar to that of a bollywood heartthrob .If I mention his name, I am sure girls will want to catch hold of me. The crow has a different colour from other birds, which makes him very attractive.

In my native place, they feed crows. The crow has a very astonishing appetite for leftovers. What more can you expect from a scavenger? With close observation I have found that the crow has a penchant for sumptuous food. Sorry, I meant sumptuous leftovers. The crow is a very social creature. Once, I had offered a crow an ample amount of something, which took him less than a minute to invite his mates for a feast. All it needed was a polite but a very raucous ‘caw…..aaaaw’! His buddies got the message very fast. ‘Come one come all’. They were obviously more than willing to oblige and seemed to come out of nowhere. They all arrived and showed gratitude towards their mate with a somewhat husky ‘caw caw’. At that moment I started appreciating their ethics. They all took the plunge together and started enjoying their meals. This goes to show that they have a very ardent way of doing things. I was looking at them from a distance. I decided to walk away as I was disgusting them with a gawk! After a few minutes a certain amount of anxiety was creeping inside me and I looked back. Gee! They all had given a burp and vapourized into thin air without a trace of anything on the ground. I presumed that the crow hates procrastination of petty things.

Oxford scientists conducted an experiment on a crow called Betty. She astonished them by deliberately bending a straight wire into a hook and using it to extract food from a container. Crows have also shown tool behaviour. Using the beaks as scissors and snipers, they fashion hooks from twigs and make barbed serrated rakes or combs from stiff leather leaves. I guess some human beings need a dose of iodine for their thyroid glands to show some crow sense! The crow is a very cunning bird. If he has to steal food from his mother’s nest he’ll do it with courtesy but while stealing from any body else’s nest he’ll do it with loads of attitude. I think it sounds very smart.

The crow shows great examples of unity. Once, I observed that an eagle was perching on a tree. This eagle resembled any beefcake from a Hollywood action flick. All crows came dashing towards the tree. It seemed as if the crows were descending from heaven to sit on the tree. This made me believe that the tree belonged to these guys. One of the crows that looked like a leader gave a very intimidating “caw caw” to the eagle with authority. I felt this dude wanted to give a piece of his mind to the macho eagle. The eagle looked very nonchalant with the attitude of ‘care a damn’ to the poor leader. The leader stared at his mates with desperation assuming that they won’t let him down. Well, these mates couldn’t stand the insult of their leader. They jeered at the eagle with a chorus ethnic song. The eagle seemed alarmed but was clumsy enough to stay there. A little fella was exasperated and flew indignantly towards the monster. He gave a nice peck to the beast and the eagle had to make an effort to turn back. By the time he had turned back, he suffered another blow. He obviously was vindictive and decided to retaliate with rancour. But then the crows were very much inspired by the heroics of the other two soldiers. They all whirled around the eagle, like majestic Mig21 airplanes that looked as if they were going to crash any moment on the eagle! The eagle did not waste time there like a stupid buffoon anticipating the airplanes to crash on him. He decided to make a move and fluttered his wings, which took him to yet another tree! Life returned to sanity with the exit of the eagle. Kudos must go to the unity of this bunch of daredevils.

Sometimes I wish I were a crow so that I could fly places without any hindrance and have a bash. How I wish I had a catchy voice like him so that I could rock everybody! I still wonder what makes the crow have such a suave personality.